King Of The Castle!

Let’s play a game…

You have $699,900 to spend on a piece of Canadian real estate.

I’m going to give you five options, and your job is to pick one.  Sound easy?

Alright, alright fine – I’m leading you all toward picking the 5th property, and the first four are just for comparison purposes, and to drive home the insanity of buying a CASTLE for $700K…

Castle01

Ready?

Let’s play.

The price is $699,900, and we have five pieces of real estate across our great country.

And if you pick one of the first four, well, then I guess you’re making me look bad…

1) 171 AV W, Foothills No 31, Red Deer, Alberta – $699,900

100240107

I don’t quite understand the address of this one, but I copied it right from the website.  I would say it’s some crazy sub-division address, but the photos make this place look pretty barren!

It’s a 4-bed, 3-bath, over 2,000 square feet, on 4.22 acres of land!

Lawnmower not included…

2) 9 Foreman Court, Yellowknife, Northwest Territories – $699,900

YellowKnife

Built in 2002, this 4-bed, 3-bath house features, as per the listing, “a driveway that has parking for a boat, an R.V., and many vehicles!”

The listing is the most complete description of the house I’ve ever seen, anywhere.  They even tell you how much of the house is R40 insulation, and how much is R28…

3) 150 Lake Bend Road, Winnipeg, Manitoba – $699,900

Winnipeg

Is it just me, or is the front door to the home absolutely DWARFED by the peaked roof above it?

This 3-bed, 2-bath homes is ‘apparently’ in the most sought after area of Winnipeg, but the WalkScore is 10, and the TransitScore is 30.  Oh – and that’s out of 100, FYI…

4) 5 Aberlady Road, Toronto, Ontario

5Aberlady

On the market now for 98 days, this 3-bed, 2-bath house in Norseman Heights features a 30-foot verandah, as per the MLS listing.

In other news, when was the last time you heard the word “verandah?”  For me, it was 1986, and I was at my grandmother’s…

5) 271 Mountain Road, Moncton, New Brunswick

Castle01

Ummm…….this is a castle, for sale in Moncton…

It’s just your standard 19,000 square foot, 4-storey, Century-year-old castle made of stone and the spirits of many men who died trying to build it…

Have a look at the other photos:

Castle03

Castle07

(FYI – window cleaners are on strike…)

Castle02

(snowplow not included, and it likes to pile zamboni-sized mounds of snow at your front door…)

Castle04

Castle05

(N.B. – I use fire extinguishers to hold doors open in my house as well)

Castle08

(These books stay with the house, and you’re free to read them while you’re waiting for your offer to be signed-back at the full asking price…)

Castle06

(I call dibs on this room!)

Here’s the description from the MLS listing:

Magnificent Heritage property. Amazing potential! What can you say about a building that has this many rooms, a chapel on site, incredible original mill work, stained glass and so much more? Stunning!! This property is an absolute must see for developers looking for potential multi-unit project, special care facility, B & B or other uses as per zoning. Parking area has potential to be increased in sloped areas. Right of way access from Universite Ave through CBC  parking lot area to left of CBC building. Close to Georges Dumont Hospital & Universite de Moncton. Property being sold in as is where is condition. Some site details: elevator (working order to be confirmed), many electrical upgrades, some air-handling/ventilation units on site, walk-in fridge (unit not in working order). All measurements & details are approximate & to be confirmed by buyer. HST applicable to sale. Potential financing options available. Call today! New roof recently done in 2014!

And if you want to visit the listing agent’s website, try not to get lost in those amazing eyes!

Well, I’ve got my priorities in order, and if I had to pick one property, I think it would be……geee……lemme think…… the CASTLE?

Act now.  This one won’t last.  Bring your fussiest buyer.  Going, Going Gone!  No need to inspect.  Shows AAA+++.  (Insert other real estate cliche’s here)

10 Comments

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  1. Sara says:

    Your eyes comment just made my day. Didn’t expect that when I clicked the link.

  2. tdotlib says:

    The Alberta house is probably on what my Albertan friends refer to as an ‘acreage’. Usually a farm plot that has been converted to a small sub-division of 5-6 homes, all with large lots. Hence the address indicating ‘Foothills 31’

  3. G__ says:

    The Castle was a school and an old folks home. Failed to find a buyer at auction

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/new-brunswick/moncton-landmark-castle-on-auction-block-1.1369201

  4. AndrewB says:

    The castle looks like it could have been a school at one point.

    As for orange garage door, the sheen on the windows makes it looks magazine-like.

    Lastly, the Yellow knife property seems pretty expensive, but obviously I don’t know the market there.

  5. Long Time Realtor says:

    What a gorgeous building to build some upscale condos within.

    Time for a price reduction? I’ll buy it right now for $299,900, sight unseen.

  6. Joe Q. says:

    I’d imagine that house insulation is pretty important in a place like Yellowknife, where the outdoor temperature doesn’t go above room temperature all that often.

  7. BillyO says:

    Felt like $700K would get more in Yellowlife

    1. jeff316 says:

      Nah the market up there is crazy. Makes Toronto look slightly less insane.

  8. Paully says:

    That looks like one of those very funny FML Listings posts from the past couple of years: Here, buy this tear-down in Willowdale for $1.5 Million or a nice mountain home in Malibu with a pool and tennis courts for less?

    She does not seem to be posting anymore. Anyone know if she actually found a house, or just gave up looking?

    1. FML Listings says:

      I gave up looking. I’m a renter forever I suppose, although still on MLS every single day to lament the nonsense.

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