MLS Musings!


I’ve really gotten away from my “bread and butter” as far as this feature is concerned!

I used to feature the actual MLS listings themselves, and the write-ups, descriptions, and text that are so full of mistakes and other laughable items.

And then we started to look at the MLS photos, since they’re much more common.

But today, let’s shift back to the “Remarks” section, and look at some of the wackiness that I read each and every day…


This is awesome.

This listing, albeit impressive on its own, is being marketed as an incredible opportunity, if you were to purchase adjoining properties!

It’s like saying, “A 5-bedroom house if you simply add two bedrooms to what is now a 3-bedroom home.”


I hate when I see things like this…

If you’re going to say “renovated and decorated by a high-end interior design firm,” why not actually NAME that firm?

It’s like putting a quote in an article and not detailing who actually said it…


Nothing to see here, folks!

The house is crooked as hell, and sinking into the ground, but the home inspector “isn’t concerned.”


I actually feel bad for the agent who listed this condo at Aura.

He or she seems to have an above-average command of the English language (which automatically gets you a real estate award of some kind…), but doesn’t seem to know the difference between “infamous” and “famous.”


For the record:


Any chance this 1-bedroom condo has FIVE kitchens?

Ah well, mistakes happen!

It’s not like this unit, advertising five kitchens, was owned and listed by a Realtor or anything…


Better safe than sorry on this next one, right?

Disclose, disclose…..ummm….I forget the third one….


This is even worse.

And the description gets worse as you read along.

Why did they stop there?  They could have continued, “May Want Gloves.  May Want To Shower After.  Vomitting A Definite Possibility.”


This actually makes me sad!

For several reasons, in fact:
1) You live in 425 square feet
2) You’re sleeping in the study
3) You can only sleep on a single stationary bed
4) You get a “partial” water view when you look southeast, from your east-facing balcony.  Don’t hurt your neck!


And last, but certainly not least, this cute caption for a condo townhouse in King West.

This is more of an “inside joke” for those who enjoy late-90’s slapstick comedy, since this is a clever play-on-words referencing a movie.


So for those of you that read to the end of this blog, how about this……free $50 Home Depot gift card for the first person who can post a comment below with:

1) Name of the movie
2) Full name of the character
3) Actor who played the character

Good Luck! 🙂


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  1. Kisan says:

    18/09/2012I absolutely love your blog and find nalery all of your post’s to be what precisely I’m looking for. can you offer guest writers to write content for yourself? I wouldn’t mind publishing a post or elaborating on a lot of the subjects you write with regards to here. Again, awesome web site!

  2. jeff yu says:

    the “may want gloves” one actually sold WAY over asking. which really surprised me.

  3. Wilson says:

    Aura *is* infamous!

  4. condodweller says:

    David, I noted you have an Aura unit above. Given how much you like condos with terraces, what do you think of units 1410,910,510,4916 and their prices currently listed on MLS in Aura? Would you put Aura in the same category with Bloor one or do you think some of these units are worth the price? 1410 at $1,165/sqft is rich, but you are getting an almost 2000sqft terrace with BBQ, hottub and shade. 510 is almost reasonable at $888,000 with a terrace and it’s also a nice 2 level loft.

    Would love to see your take on the building in a future blog.

    1. Appraiser says:

      Hey David,

      I’m with condodweller on this one. For sure.

      Could you please give me a whole bunch of your free time, professional advice and data while I kick tires and waste everyone’s time. Thanks.

  5. No thanks says:

    Why Do Real Estate Listing Capitalize Like This? It Makes It Harder To Read.

    1. Kyle says:

      What i want to know is why can’t mls just spell out Brokerage Remarks, instead of using Brkage Remks? Are they being charged per character or something?

      1. condodweller says:

        Actually yes, I know the client remarks field is a fixed length hence all the funky abbreviations to cram everything in. I’m sure the brokerage remarks are the same although we don’t normally see those unless a broker shows it to the public like here.

  6. EE says:

    It’s the “Toronto Realty Blog.” Not the “Noel Realty Blog.”

    Noel, you do a great job when you shed light on other readers’ comments, but comments like this are getting tiresome, and offer no value.

    1. Ed says:

      I get it. That’s funny.

    2. Emma says:


      Imagine Noel starts his own Realty Blog to show David up! That would teach him!

  7. Noel says:

    Why is it so newsworthy that some professionals don’t do their job properly? Half of your class was below average and is likely doing surgery on you, doing your dental work, legal work, accounting, etc. It’s not even worth focusing on.

    You do a great job when you write posts that shed light on different aspects of the real estate industry and actually educate us (not to mention throw in some great videos). Posts like today are getting tiresome and add no value.

    1. McBloggert says:


      Believe it or not, sometimes I frequent blogs for things like entertainment – a mild distraction during a workday…posts like this are always fun. While they may not offer insight into the working of the Toronto RE market, they do put a smile on my face.

      That being said, you can’t please everyone! Keep it up David.

      1. David (not the David who run's this web site) says:

        David, you’re doing a great job with this site, thanks and keep it going :-).

        Noel, you can’t expect every post on this site to be everything to everyone. We all have different interests but hey, it’s free :-). Remember that our Host, David, is probably very busy most days, so he’s not going to have a lot of time to write a Pulitzer prize winning story every second day.

        1. Noel says:

          Both comments make good points. For some reason I just felt I needed to say that!

    2. Jeremy says:


      Just because someone finished in the bottom half of their class, doesn’t mean they aren’t good at their job… especially your dentist example. Did you ask your dentist to see his/her report card?

      1. Noel says:

        Yes and he was top of the class and actually also teaches dentistry part time at U of T.

    3. Katie says:

      I actually started reading this blog when a friend sent me the “photos of the week,” and the mls musings and the photos are my favorite feature.

      I own a house and I’m not in the market, so I don’t care about listing/pricing, and blogs about mortgage rates and anything financial bores the hell out of me.

      So maybe there’s something for everybody on here? I just can’t believe somebody would have the audacity to post “these are tiresome and have no value add.” That’s balls. Just my two-cents.

      1. Noel says:

        I’m a guy. I got balls.

        1. Appraiser says:

          Unfortunately, due to a rare anatomical anomaly, they appear to be located between your ears.

  8. Ed says:

    Old School
    Frank the tank Ricard
    Will Ferrell

    1. @ Mark S and Ed

      Wow, close call here guys. “Mark S.” beat Ed by 91 minutes, but I asked for the “full name of the character,” which is, in fact, Frank Ricard.

      Remember the scene when Will Ferrell calls Marissa to ask to see her? His WIFE, Marissa? And he says, “Hello, Marrisa, this is Frank Ricard calling….”

      I hate technicalities though. So I think you both win!

      Email me – and I’ll get you set up with an HD Gift Card. Maybe one of your kids would love a wratchet-set for Christmas?

  9. Mark S. says:

    Old School
    “Frank The Tank”
    Will Ferrell