More MLS Musings!

Monday and Wednesday’s blogs were absolute beauties.

But all the comments, insight, and debate from the readers was what really made me proud of TRB.

I’ve never seen so many readers delve into their own personal lives before, and it really added to the “realness” of Toronto’s house-price problem.

So with that said, time to get less serious.  Here’s a few MLS pics and descriptions that have made me “LOL” as the kids say…

 

LaughEmoji

Oh, which one to start with.

This is always tricky.

I guess the one that’s the most current, given the sponsorship at the Olympics of a company called “361-degrees,” would be this one:

365DegreeViews

I called the listing agent and asked if you could see into the future from the rooftop.

He said “no.”

I asked if you could then see into the past?

He said “no.”

Then I think the whole “365 degree views” is somewhat misleading.

I’m disappointed…

Here’s a real gem.

Pretty “standard” crappy listing, right?

A photo of the front, a photo of the back, and a map of the property just for good measure – you know, for those people who can’t use Google Maps:

GooglePhoto2

But wait…

Is that a map?

Or is that a photo of a map?

Here’s the actual pic:

GooglePhoto

Yes, that’s a photo of somebody’s computer screen!

This person didn’t know how to save this as an image, so he or she simply took out the old Blackberry 8700, and snapped a photo.

Who would notice?

What do you notice with this one?

Look at the second photo, and the fourth photo.

No need to look at the sixth photo, since, for some odd reason, it’s a duplicate of the second photo:

Paint01

If you’re like me, you’re wondering why there’s a tray of paint on the kitchen counter?

Paint02

Two trays, in fact!

At the bar, right where you would expect to see plates.

“Kids, come sit down for dinner!  You’re having paint.”

I would love to know if this $849,000 house really has fifteen bathrooms:

15Bathrooms

Speaking of bathrooms, what’s with aerial shots on MLS?

C3420693_9

And how the heck do they get onto the ceiling anyways?

Toilet

This one really bothers me.

You list a property with “2” parking spaces, as seen in the red circle.

But then in the “brokerage remarks,” which the public doesn’t get to see, you basically admit that you have no clue if there’s one parking space or two, but that ultimately the buyer is to blame if there aren’t two spaces:

TwoSpaces

I love the verbiage too.

“Not sure of second.”

That’s precious.

Check out this photo and tell me if you see the massive, MASSIVE design flaw with this otherwise beautiful newly-renovated house:

Fridge02

Did you see it?

Look again.

Look toward the back door.

See that half an appliance hiding?

Yes, seriously, the fridge isn’t even in the kitchen!

Fridge01

Unreal.

They built a kitchen but didn’t have room for a fridge, so they jammed it by the back door.

If you opened the back door, you’d open it right into the right side of the fridge.

And if you opened the right fridge door, the handle would hit the lock on the door.

Who the HELL would buy this home?

And last but certainly not least, here’s a somewhat odd photo:

SnowInJune

Odd why?

Because of the angle?

Because of the giant van that should have been moved for the photos?

No.

Because of the snow which you probably won’t find on the ground outside today or tomorrow.

This photo was clearly taken in the winter, when this house was first listed, and the listing agent was too lazy to go back and take another photo in the summer.

Have a great weekend, everybody!

10 Comments

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  1. Stephanie Regan says:

    I’m not an agent. I’m looking for a home to buy and thus spending a lot of time looking at listings. It amazes me how sloppy some of the listings are. My big pet peeve is when the lid of the toilet is left up. For Pete’s sake, it makes any bathroom look like a frat house. Put down the lid of the damn toilet before you take a picture!

    Anyway. My family was outside an open house yesterday, about to go in, when I saw something that for us was a deal breaker: the owner of the house has a Confederate flag in a front window. I don’t know if he’s American, a fan of the Dukes of Hazzard or a white supremacist, but with my biracial family in the car it was just a no-go. We kind of laughed as we drove away, speculating on whether the agent had tried to get them to take it down, or whether he had even noticed it was there.

  2. Vivian Souroujon says:

    This is truly brilliant (meaning sharing them)….can’t believe our colleagues (I’m a real estate professional) don’t take the time to do their due diligence. I keep seeing these types of careless mistakes repeatedly….I question if the Sales Representative (which is under contract) is acting with the Seller’s best interest in mind…. Thanks for sharing David!

  3. Lucie says:

    My favourites are the listings with spelling and/or grammar mistakes. Makes my skin crawl.

  4. David (Not the David who runs this website) says:

    Thanks for the Friday laughs David.

    I love the aerial shot of the bathrooms, looks like only a small adult or a kid could use them. The average person would be out of luck.

    And the photo showing snow? Come on, it’s August and a million degrees out there. Just about everyone has a cell phone, it wouldn’t be that hard to just a few update photos.

    As for the listing with two parking spaces, isn’t it the job of the listing agent to find out the legality of both parking spots? I also love the “House is to be sold in “As is & where is” condition. What the heck does the “where is” mean? If you don’t know where the house really is, how can you sell it?

    This listing agent must be on cheap drugs…

  5. Real estate millennial says:

    These photos are funny without question, I really wonder how these real estate savants could do these idiotic things. This is clearly a problem because someone is paying for their services and usually no less than 3% and up to 5% of the sale price. In this market on an $800,000 home that’s between $24,000-$40,000. How do you fix the problem of uneducated, incompetent and greasy real estate agent? The majority of agents fit into one if not all of those categories. I understand that in all industries we have incompentance but it real estate sales it seems to be much higher. Is there a solution you can think of David?

    1. The only solution is for people to stop hiring these jokers.

      Only then will they realize that it’s their performance that is inhibiting new business.

      It’s like the Toronto Maple Leafs, and I’ve said this before.

      From 2005 to 2014, there was no incentive to build a long-term winner, since the stands were full every night, merchandise was selling, and the team was a great brand.

      Ownership only wanted to, maybe, get one round of playoff revenue, each year, and thus they built their team to make the first round, but nothing more.

      People kept buying tickets, and merchandise, and bleeding blue and white.

      It wasn’t until 2013 or 2014 that there were empty seats, and non sellouts. Not to mention, the Leafs were ranked the worst franchise in the MLB, NBA, NFL, NHL by ESPN.

      They became a joke, and brand value diminished.

      Only then did management realize they had to rebuild, and not get playoff revenue for 5-6 years.

      If people kept going to watch Phat Phil Kessel & Friends, and cheered them on, then ownership never would have changed a thing.

      So in any business, whether it’s real estate or hockey, people will continue a certain way, even if it’s a poor direction, so long as they continue to make money.

      If the public continues to hire agents, whether it’s about commission or not, who take photos on their iPhone, or put up photos sideways, or don’t update listings, etc., then those agents will never change.

      1. Kramer says:

        I agree about the Leafs… Especially because over all that time there was no chance of a second Toronto team being allowed in. So that would be like having a CAPPED number of brutal agents in the city that buyers are all happy to use.

        And that’s why I started cheering for Edmonton 5 years ago.

  6. GinaTO says:

    The house with “maybe” two parking spots – that might be the least of their problems. There seem to be no bathrooms on the main and 2nd floor (only in the basement), and “not sure” if central air works. Oh well.

  7. Paully says:

    In the second last photo, you can see that they also roughed in the space for a dishwasher, but were too lazy or cheap to install one!

  8. Pete says:

    The fridge one doesn’t bother me in the least. In my childhood home, the fridge was just off the kitchen, in what would be called the mud room now. Maybe because I grew up with it, but it never struck me as odd or inconvenient. It was took up useless space in the mud room, and freed up space in the kitchen, and was only 2 steps away.

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