The 2017 Toronto real estate market is just crazy, folks.
I need a breather. You need a breather.
It’s like when you go home after a long day of work and decide to watch an episode of Black Mirror. Then after feeling even more down, you ask yourself, “Why am I watching this?” Then you go to Netflix and find 22 Jump Street.
Well, enough Black Mirror. Bring on the antics of Jonah Hill…
Maybe I’m out of touch.
Seriously. It’s possible.
It may be that I really don’t understand “marketing” in 2017, and perhaps taking photos of the condo, shown in the best light possible, is no longer “in.”
Take the following listing, for example.
This was a really, really weird collection of photos all around.
Take a look at the photo array:
Which do you find to be the strangest photo?
I know, I know – that’s like asking “Which kid do you love the most?”
But note that the very first photo, which is the feature photo shown on the MLS listing, is of a child’s bedroom, rather than the outside of the building.
But then photo #3 is this:
What is that?
I know – it’s “Minion.”
But why the need for a closeup photo of a stuffed doll, rather than, say, the living room, bathroom, etc?
Then what the hell is this:
That’s a chair!
Why take a photo of a chair?
Is that the “Den?”
Then how about this:
That’s a photo of the pool table in the amenity area.
I love showing photos of the amenities.
But couldn’t they have asked that little girl to move for two seconds?
Now she’ll be in the MLS archives forever.
And last but not least, what listing isn’t complete without a photo of…….the mailroom?
Really weird stuff.
How about this one:
It looks to me like only the second photo, which is of the building, and probably taken from the MLS archives, is right-side-up.
Actually, wait, photo #4 might be too, but I can’t tell what the hell that is, since it’s a portrait photo jammed in a landscape spot.
How about this one:
The second photo is on an angle.
How could ANYBODY upload this photo?
The rest of the photos suck, don’t get me wrong.
But that one just doesn’t make any sense.
More sideways photos, nothing new here.
2/6 are right-side-up, 4/6 are sideways.
But what the hell is that photo there where I’ve put the red question mark?
If you turned your head, you already know.
It’s a shower:
A terrible, glarry, crooked photo of a shower, but still – now we know!
Just awful work.
The seller should fire their agent.
Here’s a photo that looks like it was taken from a bathroom spy-cam:
If you buy this place, make sure you check for hidden cameras…
What’s with this new trend of “showing that things work?”
Like showing that the faucet works:
Is that “artsy?” I just don’t know
Or what about showing that your fridge and dishwasher are real, and not just cardboard cut-outs:
Great! Now I can put food in my fridge like I had hoped!
Or this other new trend of showing the door to the condo?
Like this one, that leaves us wondering, “Which unit is for sale? 602 or 603?”
Or what about this really creepy, haunted condo:
Sorry, but that’s “The Ring” type creepy.
And last but not least, if you want really creepy, how about a photo taken from the perspective of somebody peeking into the bathroom when they found the door closed:
Like I said – maybe I’m out of touch.
I have five listings coming out this month, and all of them will show photos of the property itself.
But maybe I should be taking photos of inanimate objects around the condo instead?