There’s no real theme with this month’s edition of MLS Musings; just a lot of really weird, awkward, curious, laughable, pathetic, lazy, and incorrect photos and descriptions that I, along with my Merry Musing Mob, have put together over the last couple of weeks.
Want to be a part of said Mob?
If you see something ridiculous on MLS, please send it my way. I assure you – you won’t be alone in that endeavour…
Before I get into the musings, can I just show you something?
It’s a complicated world we live in out there, in 2018.
Thursday night’s election will anger some, and satisfy others, while all the while, the world gets more complex by the day.
Quite often, I find myself yearning for a much simpler time.
A time when………………well, when men wore belted sweaters
Yes, belted sweaters.
Sweaters with built-in belts.
All different kinds of them too.
Different colours, different textures, different patterns, and different designs.
Some with long-sleeves, some with short-sleeves. Some crew-cut, and some v-neck.
I yearn for the time when men wore belted-sweaters…
…and, a time when belted-sweaters were so en vogue, that they commanded their own publication:
Tough act to follow, but I’ll try…
First, how about a couple of really bad photo arrays on MLS?
Like this first one, which satisfies all the tenets of a classic photo array disaster:
1) The feature photo is of nothing special.
2) Many of the photos are sideways.
3) The sideways photos are both 90-degrees left, as well as 90-degrees right.
4) At least one photo of a room must be of 92% floor.
5) A classic shot of the laundry machines, preferably sideways.
6) And a photo of the kitchen looking tiny, right next to one actually making it look big.
Have a look:
This array isn’t nearly as good. And by good, I mean bad.
The feature photo is horizontal, there are 2/8 photos are of the kitchen, essentially from the same spot, the colour in 4/8 of the photos makes it look like a different camera was used, and last but not least, and certainly expected – more upside-down photos:
a) The listing agent has left the photos this way for three weeks.
b) The seller hasn’t noticed.
One of the fields on the “MLS Data Form” refers to photos.
There are three options:
1) Upload your own photo(s)
2) Use photo from library.
3) No photo for this listing.
If you’re wondering why anybody would choose option #3, we think alike, but that’s a topic for another day.
If you’re wondering what the “library” is, I assure you, inquiring minds want to know.
MLS apparently has a library of sites throughout the city. A stockpile, of stock images.
Which might explain why the following image appears for 560 King Street:
But hey, at least they got the CN Tower in the background!
What’s more Toronto than that, right?
The following needs no explanation:
Wait, actually, it does.
WHY is there a bathtub filled with dirt in the backyard of this house for sale?
Is this a selling feature?
Is this something I don’t know about that people are into today? Like doing things socially on weekends, taking photos of your lunch and putting it on social media, or streaming music rather than still downloading MP3’s?
Or was somebody just too lazy to take the tub to the dump, and instead, filled it with dirt to make it a planter?
I think I might get some feedback on this one…
Nothing creepy in this photo.
Unless we take the photo from the other side of the room….
….wait, I take it back…
….it’s creepy “AF,” as the kids say…
That is how you want to advertise your home for sale.
I’m no meteorologist, but I think it was windy when this photo was taken:
I’m no home inspector, but I think, this might not be the proper use of a downspout:
I’m no landscaper, but I think this grass is a bit synthetic:
I’m no software engineer, but I think this lawn might be photo-shopped…
I’m no anthropology instructor, but I think the owners of this home might be Italian or Portuguese…
I’m no fall-down-drunk, but I think whoever took this photo was laying on the floor:
And last, but certainly not least, I don’t have my glasses on, so please tell me if you see anything odd here:
Need a closer look?
Okay, let’s take another step closer…
A living room toilet!
If only we could all be so lucky!
Hey, I know there’s clearly a story behind it. I’m not laughing at the person who lived in this house, I’m laughing with them.
My Dad always used to say, “You have to be able to laugh at yourself.” And I’ve made a living with self-deprecating humour on my blog.
So when you see something awkward, like a toilet in a living room, in a house for sale, you’re not a bad guy or gal for having a chuckle.
Have a great weekend, everybody!