There have been some great posts on “Worst Realtor Photos” through the years, but rather than just copy somebody else’s work, or Google “terrible real estate agent head shots” and put them up on a Pinterest-style board for you to view, today, I’d like to mock the most common Realtor head-shot “styles.”
Every Realtor goes into their photography session with an open mind, but some, beleive it or not, come out……with a chicken.
Seriously. What the hell were some of these people thinking?
Let’s have a look…
I’d like to divide these into categories, if I may.
As I said at the onset, “bad real estate agent photos” is just way too easy a post. Those articles, blogs, and features are all over the Internet, and if you simply Google that term, you’ll see some real doozies!
But as a member of the industry, I see more than just an awkward photo of an ugly person sitting on the roof of an Alabama trailer-home. I see people actually trying to look good, but failing.
Let’s take a look at the major offenders…
Realtor & Family
I’m so tired of these!
The advertisements for one agent are scattered through North Toronto, and just because somebody takes a photo with their family doesn’t automatically make them trustworthy.
“Hi there! I’m John! I have a wife and a kid, therefore you can trust me with your life decision!”
Just because a person was able to:
a) find a person to marry
b) conceive a child
…doesn’t mean that they’re trustworthy, and/or good at what they do. Just because somebody “has a family” doesn’t negate every other concern you may have had.
You know who else “had a family?”
This guy:
’nuff said…
Realtor & Dog!
Take the above a step further…
How many Realtors out there take photos with their dogs?
“Hi there, I’m Jane. I have two dogs, and I haven’t killed and eaten either of them, so you can trust me with your purchase decision.”
Is it really that simple?
I get it – some real estate agents try to “humanize” themselves. I mean, I write blog where zero percent of my life is private, and whereby my real and true thoughts and opinions will net me fanfare one day, and scorn the next.
But do Realtors really think that a photo of them with a dog automatically gains the public’s trust?
I suppose it could be worse…
Realtor & Chicken
This makes zero sense…
Not to sound redundant, but again, ’nuff said….
The Realtor On His or Her Phone
Yeah, I get it.
You make phone calls for a living.
I know. I do it too.
But you don’t need to have a photo of you making phone calls, to let prospective clients know that you make phone calls.
It’s almost like you’re showing off at something moronically easy.
There should be a “Realtor breathing” photo, whereby the person in the photo is taking a huge gasp of air, just to show that he or she can sustain life by breathing.
And if you are going to use a phone in your photo, then use an iPhone, not a landline:
Do you think that guy still has his “facsimile” number on his business card? And does his business card still have the monthly payment calculator for interest rates up to 18%?
The Realtor “Lean”
How come so many Realtors lean in their photos?
Why do they always think that turning their body the other way, then looking at the camera, is a good way to show their merits?
It’s awkward.
But not as awkward as…
The Realtor Awkward Angle Photo
What’s with the aerial view?
Who took this photo?
Was the photographer on the lookout, maybe for an ex-wife, or a private-eye? Maybe he just quickly snapped this photo on the way down from the roof?
It’s like on “Photo Day” when you were in grade three or four – when the photographer would say to you, “And turn……turn……turn……turn…..more…….up……chin……down……chin…..left….turn…..up….”
And the result was always something like that…
The Realtor With Arms Crossed, Looking Confident
This is clearly the most common Realtor pose, although there’s a fine line between looking confident, and trying to balance the look with a friendly smile:
Then when you over-smile, you lose the swagger and confidence, and just look happy that you’re making so much goddam money:
But if you don’t smile at all, AND you have hair from the 1970’s, AND are built like a football linebacker, then you look like this:
The Realtor Caricature
Do people do this because:
a) They’re old
b) They’re ugly
c) The don’t “photograph well,” which is what you usually tell ugly people
d) All of the above
Realtor Trying To Be Cool/Different/Approachable
How about a shot of you drinking?
There are no alcoholic Realtors, are there?
How about a shot of you being too-cool-for-school?
Giving that weird “index-finger-touching-thumb circle thingee” that nobody has given since the 1980’s, while wearing triple-pleated pants, and a lime green shirt with no blazer, the way a car salesman would?
Or how about…
…….wait….
…….wait, this needs no description…
Just an epic fail.
As is this:
Did I miss that seminar on how creepy dolls help Realtors attract new buyers?
As I said at the onset, there are so many “awful Realtor photo” pages on the Internet, that I didn’t want to re-hash features that countless others have done, but those simply needed to be highlighted.
Hopefully this provided you with a chuckle to start your morning.
I love these short weeks.
Hopefully we can elect a new government that will insist on three statutory holidays per month…
RPG
at 9:31 am
David, surely you’ve taken a few pics over the years that could find their way into this post.
Care to share those??
Mark
at 9:47 am
Awesome post. Just awesome 🙂
Dave
at 10:00 am
The lean is actually a psychological play. The open shoulders are inviting, using non-verbal communication to let a client know that they are approachable and willing to help. The face is square on, to allow the eyes to make contact and say that they are confident in their ability to deliver results.
The aerial angle is a reaffirmation that you are in charge, not the realtor, so you are looking down on them.
I’m actually surprised that realtors still do the crossed arms since that is a very confrontational pose, with resistance to accepting new ideas.
The one pose you are forgetting is the “team” photo, where its a father/son, mother/daughter, husband/wife 4 friends etc. where the impression is that you are getting more value for your money because ALL of them are going to be working for you. The worst example was an ad in the Junction where 4 women were all wearing pantsuits with linked arms, huge smiles, and fresh from the salon/spa. I’m not sure that this shows that they are serious realtors, but rather that they would be great to take with you to Holt Renfrew for a great shopping spree
Ottawa Gord
at 10:08 am
a couple more: the Realtor pair back to back, the Realtor in the weird hat, the Realtor in the kilt…all entertaining!
IanC
at 10:56 am
Arm Cross #3, witht the platinum hair and pearl necklace.
She is bringing total FIERCENESS.
Ian
jeff316
at 11:14 am
Whenever there is a photo of a family on a real estate agent ad, I never know if it is their family or a client’s family. The ad at Dufferin and Dupont for Suzy Goldstein with that Asian family is so confusing.
Boris
at 11:52 am
How about this broad:
http://realestate.aol.com/blog/2012/11/09/ridiculous-realtor-names-listing-fails/#!fullscreen&slide=864352
Or what about that dickwad Brad Lamb?
steve
at 3:40 pm
great post !!!
GinaTO
at 4:11 pm
I find the lamb ads from Brad Lamb creepy. Yeah, we know what your last name is, do you need to be so literal about it?
8th best
at 5:00 pm
I really like it that the “Ken & Chuck” one says “Voted 8th Best Real Estate Team”. To me, that phrase works against him/them.
AlexUnder
at 10:35 pm
I especially love the pictures taken 20 year ago – and I am not talking about some old or antique pictures – some salesmen and great number of saleswomen are particularly attached to pictures taken when they were younger and better-looking….Really funny to see them finally in person and ..wait… that ad… it was you or your daughter????
Realy Home
at 3:13 am
Waw. What a great post. I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks a lot for sharing.
Paully
at 7:12 am
Don’t forget that in some parts of the world, the index-finger-thumb-circle does not mean A-OK. In some cultures, it means a**hole! Now that is a message that you want to send to all your prospective clients!
Chroscklh
at 10:31 am
Back home, is customary take picture with bear – is say “I strong, I confident” also “no pay commission, I feed u to bear”
Chroscklh
at 10:32 am
Comment
iwill
at 5:06 pm
ouch Loretta Stewart!
bugeyedbrit
at 8:15 pm
I am generally confused by the whole ‘cult of personality’ with regard to real estate in North America, in England its all companies, no one particularly cares who the estate agent is…
Chase
at 8:00 am
SAY what…
What do you recommend an agent do? …
What mind photo would you approve?
Noel
at 9:06 am
Thanks for a great laugh and you are dead on, but you never described or showed what you think a good photo is.
Stephanie Martynuck
at 10:18 am
Ok, that was hilarious….still laughing!!!