Ahoy, Mate!


2 minute read

March 6, 2012

There are those houses that are strange and different simply to be different, and then there are those houses that the owners think are totally normal.

I think this one falls into the latter category…

I’ve seen some crazy houses in my day, but nothing quite like this.  They’ve taken the nautical “theme” to extremes, and it’s no longer a theme as much as this house has been transformed into equal parts of boat, submarine, and dinghy.

Thanks to my good friend and colleague, Jessica Goodwin, for providing me with these photos!  I believe Jess was out for a leisurely stroll in London, Ontario one weekend when she happened upon an open house.

However, this open house happened to be 20,0000 leagues under the sea, and thus the photos that follow.

In case you missed it above, or didn’t look close enough, that boat is actually a bar!

Some people have bars in their basements, but how many have a bar shaped like a BOAT?  And how many have a ship’s steering wheel on the wall next to it?

As great as the boat is, this is even better!

These people have a submarine door leading to their basement rec-room!

And that isn’t cardboard or drywall – that’s the real deal!  That is solid steel, several inches thick!

I’m curious, however: do you think that wheel actually turns the lock on the door?  Or is it just for show?

“Going down periscope, captain!”

This is their shower, and it looks like a cross between a submarine’s periscope, and the Tin Man from Alice in Wonderland.

And then, we have their bathtub, which looks like it’s in the bell-tower of a church.

The wine cellar is lit by candles in a really creepy 1500’s England kind of style:

This one’s a doozie as well.

Check this out – it’s a closet, but they’ve continued the wallpaper over the doors!

Maybe they’re trying to disguise the doors and hide the closet – like a wall safe!

This one needs no explanation.  Just downright creepy…

And last but certainly not least, take a gander at this beauty.

I don’t know how to describe this.  It looks like drapery, since it’s hung from a rod, but it’s art, and it’s on what looks like a carpet.

What the hell is this?

Oh boy.

If these were my sellers, I’d want to pour a LOT of money into staging…

Written By David Fleming

David Fleming is the author of Toronto Realty Blog, founded in 2007. He combined his passion for writing and real estate to create a space for honest information and two-way communication in a complex and dynamic market. David is a licensed Broker and the Broker of Record for Bosley – Toronto Realty Group

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  1. McBloggert

    at 9:14 am

    Words don’t describe how much I love this house!

    Please keep this post on file Mr. Fleming – next time I’m in the market – I would like to use this as the benchmark.

  2. Jeff Norris

    at 9:15 am

    David – just discovered your blog and enjoying getting caught up on all your excellent content.

    This posting reminds me of a house that has been for sale on Chine Drive in the Bluffs for a very long time:


    While this one is not “customized” to such an extent as the subject of your post, I can’t help but think that some of the design choices have hampered a quick sale.

    But, this raises some interesting questions. In your opinion, are there cases where very specific design customizations can help a sale or boost a price? Are there many buyers out there who do not want a clean slate and are instead looking for some “flair”?

    1. David Fleming

      at 1:16 pm

      @ Jeff,

      Unfortunatley, I think the captain of this ship won’t acknowledge that the ‘style’ is going to negatively impact the price he gets for his home. One of the toughest parts of my job is gently explaining to sellers that their home is better/worse/drastically-worse than the house that sold up the street or down the block. Many buyers make purchase decisions based on emotion, first impressions, and gut-feelings, so you really want to make a property as generic as possible and appeal to 100% of the buyer pool.

  3. George

    at 9:41 am

    That door is fantastic! Of course, I’d never buy that house. Too daunting to change it all, and I don’t think I could live with it.

  4. Center of the Universe

    at 10:25 am

    David, I’ve seen a lot of these monstrosities at open houses in the N2 MLS region. Speaking of the inner suburbs, what is your opinion regarding buying a home just north of Steeles (Thornhill) vs. just south of Steeles (North York). Is there any advantage to overpaying for a small bungalow in North York that has an extra land transfer tax and more crime?

  5. Gord Martin

    at 1:12 pm

    Awww c’mon guys. We’ve staged all the personality out of so many homes. While this place goes to some extremes and would be a challenge to sell well, the owners show creativity and an eccentric joie de vivre that should be praised. The work looks to have been well done which has to be a surprising bonus. And the thing you’re have trouble figuring out is a tapestry, possibly antique, usually hung this way on a wall.

    1. Scott

      at 10:00 pm

      A little too much personality for my tastes — which I figure is the general reasoning behind staging in the first place.

  6. Barry

    at 4:04 pm

    I think the captain is going down with this ship!

Pick5 is a weekly series comparing and analyzing five residential properties based on price, style, location, and neighbourhood.

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