I figured this was a necessary follow-up to yesterday’s post.  Although this story isn’t so much about overzealous security, as much as it details the red-tape that we Realtors encounter when conducting showings…

I remembered this story shortly after writing yesterday’s blog post, and this one is even “better.”

Of course, “better” means “worse,” if you’re on the other side of the equation.

It’s better if you’re a reader, and worse if you’re, well….me.

But not just me, however.  Think about how my buyer-clients felt as they sat there with me through the following ordeal…

10 Queen’s Quay.

That’s where this story takes place.

It’s called “World Trade Centre,” which at the risk of being insensitive, might have affected property values ever-so-slightly after the events of eleven years ago.  If you think that buyers will ignore the “little” things like a building being named after a giant explosion in everybody’s mind, then think again.  Buyers are fickle, and they’re not likely to look favourably on a building called “Ted Bundy Estates” or “BP Deepwater Horizon Condos” either.

I was showing condos at 10 Queen’s Quay about three years ago, and as luck would have it in this case, it was the last showing of the day on a very busy day.  I believe we saw about eight condos before this one, but this was the one my clients really wanted to see!

I greeted the concierge, Oh master of the key, and told him that I was there to show unit XXX at 4:30pm.  I was right on time, too!

He pulled out his magical binder of glory and began to thumb through it.

He started to shake his head as he turned each and every page, and the shake got more pronounced as the pages went on.

He let out a few “Eeeeeee’s” and “Hmmmmmm’s” as he continued shaking his head, and then finally looked up at me and said, “I’m not seeing it.”

“Seeing what?”  I asked.

“Your appointment.”  He said.   “You don’t have an appointment.”

Not wanting to get into an argument right away, I said, “Well I do have an appointment, but it’s just not in that binder.  Is that what you mean?”

To my surprise, he responded, “No, you don’t have an appointment.  If you did, it would be in this binder.”

Oh yeah – this was going to be tough!

I looked at my clients and one of them motioned with his hand as if to say, “Go ahead, do what you need to do.”  I never want to come off as a jerk, but sometimes you simply have no choice.

I said to the concierge, “Don’t worry, I’ll get this straightened out right away,” and I called the listing agent directly.  He told me that I did in fact have an appointment, so I put him on speakerphone and asked him to repeat himself for the concierge.  “Hi there, this is John Smith,” the agent said aloud.  “Go ahead and let David into the unit – we’re all good.  We’re confirmed and the seller is out for the day.”

The concierge nodded, and I thanked the agent and hung up.

Then the concierge said, “Sorry, but I can’t let you go up to the unit.”

I had a feeling that was coming.

“That could have been anybody on the phone – your brother, your friend, anybody!”

I guess…….maybe…..he was right.  If I wanted to run a scam, I could have just called my friend and asked him to play along….just like yesterday’s post.  These concierges can sure sniff out a rouse!

In any event, I called the brokerage and they confirmed that I had a showing, but that too didn’t convince the concierge.  I did the same thing – put the receptionist on speakerphone, allowed the concierge to hear it, but as soon as I shut off the phone, I said, “So that too could be a friend or a sister or a mother?”  He nodded, without smiling, and said, “Let me show you something…”

He proceeded to open up the magical binder once again, and he pulled out one of the sheets of paper with as much care as you’d handle the original copy of the Declaration of Independence.

He held it out with both hands and said, “Do you see this?  This is what I need in order to release the keys to the condo.  This is the “Showing Request Authorization Form” that we have for ALL our Realtor showings.”

Okay.  Well, I certainly couldn’t disagree with that!

I don’t make the rules, and I can’t change overzealous ones, so even if the listing agent AND the brokerage confirmed my appointment, I still had to obtain that magical sheet of paper.

As luck would have it, the listing brokerage was Coldwell Banker, and they were right next door – about a forty foot walk.

I told the concierge that I would head over to the brokerage and speak to the same person who just confirmed the showing on the phone, and ask her to provide this magical piece of paper.  He nodded, and went back to lining up his Bic pens in perfect order on his desk.

I walked over to the Coldwell Banker office and told the receptionist what was going on.  She laughed and said, “Yeah, they’re not the easiest to deal with.  I’m used to it.”

She filled out the form that the concierge had demanded, and handed to me, saying “Good Luck!”

I walked back to the lobby of 10 Queen’s Quay and proudly handed the form to the concierge.

“Here you are, sorry if I came off as rude earlier.  It’s just a lot to deal with, that’s all,” I said, extending the olive branch.

Completely ignoring my attempt at civility, he said, “That’s not the form I need.”

Huh?  Come again?  He just showed me the form he had in his magic binder and this one was identical!  I JUST got it from next door, and the ink was still wet!

I said, “This is IT.  This is the form!  You JUST showed it to me!”

And this is where the story takes an unvelievable turn.

Talk about red-tape.

Talk about unnecessary.

Talk about being difficult.

The concierge said to me, “Yes, that is the form I need, however I need to receive it through the fax machine.”

You’ve got to be kidding.

My friends who know me quite well will say, “Dave never stops talking,” however at this very moment, I was speechless.

The form that I had obtained – directly from the source – the brokerage, needed to be faxed?

I said to the concierge, “This is one step better – I cut out the middle-man!  I went and got the form myself!  This is the ORIGINAL copy!  Why fax something when you can hand it off?”

He replied, “That’s protocol.  I need to received a faxed request from the brokerage.”

HOLY $*!&$

I lost my mind.

I lost it in front of my clients, who evidently, were not upset, since they joined me in reaming out this concierge.

I’m sorry – I understand “protocol,” but he was just wasting our time.  He was being unhelpful for no good reason, and his actions were completely without merit.

I knew that this key-keeper wasn’t going to let me up to the unit unless I did exactly as he specified, so I walked back (next door!) to the Coldwell Banker brokerage, asked the girl at the front desk to FAX the request to the concierge, and then went back to the lobby and waited.

There we were – my two clients, myself, and the concierge, all waiting by the fax machine.

It took about five minutes, and those were the longest five minutes of my life.  Not one of the four of us said a word.

Then the fax machine started to shake, buzz, and a piece of paper came out.  It would have been tragically ironic if we were waiting all that time, and it was just a menu for a chinese food restaurant, but alas, it was the Showing Request Authorization Form that we needed.

The concierge picked it up, put on his glasses, and slowly mulled it over as he leaned back in his chair and scratched the stubble on his chin.

“Well…..” he started, “Okay.  Everything looks in order here.  I just need a business card and your RECO ID.”

Worried that I might fall into another trap, I handed over the two pieces of cardboard somewhat anxiously, but everything was in fact, in order.  He handed them back to me, gave me the key, and FINALLY we were off to see the unit.

I wish I had a happy ending here and I could say that the unit was worth the wait, but my clients hated it, and we were only inside for about two minutes.

As I said yesterday, I wouldn’t be surprised if the same thing (or worse) happened again.

Life is full of people on power-trips who love to waste other people’s time.

It’s just too bad we come across so many of them in the real estate business…