Agents across the city are now sending me their own photos-of-the-week, or submissions for “MLS Musings.”
And I appreciate them all! Sometimes it’s hard to pick my favourite, although I’m willing to forgive a poorly-written write-up, spelling mistakes, or poor English. It’s the blurry photos I just can’t comprehend.
But should the sellers be left off the hook here? Aren’t they looking at their own MLS listing, wondering why there’s a giant thumb in the middle of the “Feature Photo?”
Ah well. You get what you pay for.
Enjoy!
Let’s star this week with my absolute favourite!
And thanks to another Realtor out there for sending this to me.
A listing came out last week with twelve photos on MLS, and while the first six photos were pretty brutal – just simple iPhone pics, the next six photos were pics of the unit, on an iPhone!
Yes, six iPhone screen captures, instead of actual photos:
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This photo below cannot be real.
It just can’t be.
It has to be photo-shopped.
Except, it’s not. A blog reader took this photo and sent it to me.
Maybe this is why Tiger Woods infamously “backed out of his driveway into a fire hydrant,” and maybe it’s not as bad as it sounded?
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This photo below looks pretty harmless, right?
But this is actually the magic of staging, with great photography!
This tiny townhouse-condo has virtually no living space, so they put a 2-person dining table right next to the stairs…
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Am I drunk, or is this blurry?
Or maybe the listing agent who included this photo of his or her brand-spanking-new condo listing just has really, really bad eyesight?
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More photographic MAGIC below!
This looks like a totally ordinary bedroom, right?
High ceilings, room for two over-sized nightstands.
What’s the catch, and why is this photographer good at his job?
Because there’s eight inches between the foot of the bed, and the wall. And the door has to be opened out into the living room, so people can actually get into this tiny little room:
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I’ve heard a lot of buyers say, and I might inclined to agree, that the concrete pillars in condos really kill the space.
If they’re completely tucked away, in the corner of the room, then it’s not so bad.
But when they’re even 2-3 feet away from the wall, it messes up furniture placement.
Despite that, the seller of this condo found, or so he thought, a way to make the pillar blend into the background:
What’s more than the metal, mirrored wrapping of the pillar, is that the listing agent must have liked it so much, he included multiple photos of it in the listing:
“We have to get it from different ANGLES!”
A quote from The Simpsons! Can anybody remember who said it, and in what episode?
In any event, here’s a third photo of the pillar…
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If you stage your condo like the owners of the following unit have, you’re really refining your target market down to one specific demographic:
Again, they’ve got it from different angles!
But it seems as though they took the whole Japanese theme a bit too far, as they included the following two photos in the MLS Listing:
I thought Japan was the land of the rising son.
This sun seems to be setting…
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I don’t even know what to say about these two photos:
I mean, it’s different. I’ll give the seller that.
But this is just another 1-bed, 1-bath condo.
It’s not a unique layout, it doesn’t have an awesome terrace, it’s not a hard loft, and it’s not different from another 100 units in the building.
So why make it look crazy?
Why list it like this? Every buyer out there is automatically going to calculate how much it costs to paint.
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That’s it for today, but on Monday I’m going to impress the pants off you with more statistics!
Yes, from one end of the spectrum, to the other. From funny photos on a Friday, to boring stats on a Monday. I try to provide a little something for everybody…
Since the week after Victoria Day weekend, I tracked all the listings in E01, E02, and E03, just to follow up on the theme I had on TRB the previous week.
Now the results are in, and I want to analyze what sold, what didn’t, and more specifically how they sold.
Have a great weekend, everybody!
Ralph Cramdown
at 7:51 am
There’s no accounting for taste amongst vampires.
Pete
at 11:56 am
Right? Did they photoshop themselves out of that picture or are they a vampire realtor?
A Grant
at 8:01 am
The Radioactive Man movie director. Forget which episode…
My eyes! The goggles do nothing!
Tamir
at 10:16 am
It wasn’t the Director, it was Rainier Wolfcastle himself as Radioactive Man!
Classic quote!
XYZABC
at 10:26 am
Cant wait for the stats. I live in E03, and there are two houses on the street which came out just after the Wynne announcement. Both have been languishing on the market, and have had multiple rounds of price cuts, still no takers…
Buckley B. Buckington
at 11:09 am
Jiminy Jillikers!
m m
at 11:43 am
It’s likely that the hydrant was there before the driveway got widened without a permit. Look at the curb, it’s only lowered to the left of the hydrant.
Paully
at 2:21 pm
The last two look like something from Willy Wonka.
Lucie Papulkas
at 6:09 pm
AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
lui
at 6:14 pm
At least they aren’t stretching the photos to ungodly size that its barely viewable and thinking any future buyer would not notice.