Just what exactly is a time-share?

Who buys these things?  Why?  Where?

A few years back during a trip to Florida, I witnessed first-hand why people buy time-shares.

The reason can be summed up in one word: PRESSURE!

In August of 2002, just before I started my career in real estate, I went with my then-girlfriend, Tanya, down to Fort Lauderdale, Florida for our “anniversary.”

I secretly referred to this “anniversary” as “Dave’s Golfing Vacation”…

Tanya’s parents were the proud owners of a time-share, which they could use at one of many locations across North America, the Caribbean, and South America.

For those that don’t understand what a time-share is, I can explain to a basic degree, but the types of time-shares are so vast and differ so greatly.  Basically, a group of investors own title to a particular unit or building, and each of them receives a certain allotment of time during which they can use that unit.

The types of time-shares vary drastically.  For example, you might only be able to use one particular condominium/apartment unit in one building in one city.  Or maybe a time share could see you stay in any number of units in several buildings within a complex.  Further to the point, you may own a time-share in a large company that has properties all over the world.

This is the type of time-share that Tanya’s family owned, and at the risk of being unoriginal, we settled on Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

The room we stayed in was at a large hotel, and was equipped with a full kitchen, two bathrooms, and three television sets in the bedroom, living room, and sun-room.  The facilities in the hotel were exceptional, and the pool was literally a stone’s throw from the ocean itself.

Oh….and the concierge knew a LOT about where I should golf!

Upon arriving at the hotel, we were told that all guests are entitled to a $75.00 cash disbursement for simply “filling out a survey.”

The catch?

We would soon find out…

We booked an appointment for this “survey,” and we were told to come down at noon on Thursday.

At noon on Thursday there were fifteen other couples just like us, all young; many recently married or engaged, and all of them either owning or making use of somebody else’s time-share.

I asked what we were doing standing around in the lobby, and the hotel administrator told us we were going to board a bus and they were going to take us to a free lunch!  Sweeeeet!  But we were then told, “Wait here for a moment, you’re waiting for Elizabeth.”  I asked who Elizabeth was, and we were told, “She’s your rep.”

Funny, I didn’t know I had a rep.  In fact, I wasn’t sure why I needed a rep, and what she might be representing!

Elizabeth finally sauntered down the ramp, with her many necklaces jingle-jangling, her fingernails an inch long over her many rings, and just reeking of strong perfume.  She greeted us with a drawn-out, “Hellooooo, daaawwwwwlings!”

I should have known right then and there that I was about to be had.

We boarded the bus, and Elizabeth asked us how long we had been engaged for.  Before I could even open my mouth to say, “Sloooow down there, sister,” Tanya piped up and said “Two weeks, actually,” then she stealthily slipped her very small diamond ring onto the ring finger of her left hand.  This ring was probably worth a couple hundred bucks and was a Christmas gift from her parents several years earlier.

Tanya whispered to me, “All these people are married or engaged!  If they don’t think we’re engaged, maybe we don’t qualify for this survey!”

At lunch, Elizabeth asked us about a million-and-one questions about our occupations, finances, spending habits, credit-worthiness, travel expenditures, and other subjects that should have made me known she had an ulterior motive.

She explained to us that we were going to need to attend a “presentation” on time-shares in order to qualify for the $75.00 in cash.  She told us not to worry, and that she knew we were young and not in the market to actually BUY a time-share, but that she thought we were sweet kids and she wanted us to fill our heads with knowledge and that the presentation would be good information.

She continued to press us for personal details, and made notes on a checklist on her clipboard, and then she did the most unusual thing….

……she ate TWO hamburgers!  Wow!

She sat there and kept saying, “Oh boy, I can’t believe I’m eating two hamburgers!  Good Lord!  I’m amazed!”

Tanya and I were even more amazed!  No amount of shuffle-board or lawn-darts was going to work those two burgers off of Elizabeth’s 60-year-old frame.  (This info isn’t essential to the story, but MAN I couldn’t believe how much this brod ate!!)

I looked around the room at all the happy couples, and all their “reps,” and I still didn’t know what was going on.  I still didn’t clue in to what we had been tricked into doing, and I had even less of an idea where we were all headed.

Tanya and Elizabeth made casual conversation about time-shares and how happy her parents were that they had bought one.  In actual fact, Tanya’s father had won about $20,000 playing blackjack at a Las Vegas casino, and rather than risk losing it back to the casino, as most people eventually do, he went and bought a time-share with the money so he had no choice but to absorb the winnings in the form of an asset.

Smart move!

Elizabeth thought so as well.  She began to make statements that I found somewhat outlandish such as, “A time-share is the single greatest investment that a person can possibly make.”

Okaaaaay….

After Elizabeth chased her second hamburger with a tall glass of milk and thick slice of double-chocolate cake, the fifteen happy couples boarded the bus back to the hotel.  All the “reps” sat in the middle of the couples this time around, and I while I wanted to brush this off as a coincidence, I wondered what the odds were of this unique seating arrangement…

Once back at the hotel, the head rep shouted “this way, folks, this way,” as he hoarded us like cattle down the hallway and into a large conference room.

Elizabeth kept telling us, “Don’t worry, daaawlings, you just watch the presentation, learn as much as you can, and we’ll get you set up with your $75.00 so you can go out to dinner.”

That seemed like a fair enough plan.  We got a free lunch, filled out the survey with the information they needed, and now we’d view a short presentation.  It seemed like a very fair deal for the $75.00 we’d be getting.  At the time, the U.S. dollar was at about $1.55 CDN, which gave us all the more reason to want the money!

We began to file into the conference room, and upon my first glimpse of the setup of the room I knew something wasn’t right.

The entire room was a series of round tables with three chairs, each table having pens and papers on it.

WERE WE ABOUT TO WRITE AN EXAM?

No.

We were about to get the world’s greatest sales pitch on time-shares, and nobody was leaving that room until they signed on the dotted-line…

(TO BE CONTINUED)